Rethink the Dream

When I was 33 years old I began shopping for my first home home and I've never been so stressed, and exhilarated at the same time.  Since then, nearly everyone I've ever worked with would confirm that this is a very emotional process.  I remember looking at dozens of houses that met my requirements of having a bedroom, toilet, kitchen, etc. as well as a small outdoor space to sit and enjoy the breeze.  And I remember rejecting almost all of them because they didn't speak to me, didn't feel quite right, or were missing some kind of aesthetic.   Its mostly a hypothetical but that feeling is very real and everyone feels it.  If you've ever been there, you know what I'm talking about.

The are really only two significant factors people measure when processing their various choices of a new residence.  The list of pros and cons we write out might be lengthy, even arduous.  Nevertheless, underneath all the details lies contrasting motivation at the core that is driven by only two things. 

1. Financial Investment

2. Status Fulfillment

The first rule of real estate is location, location, location.  When thinking about the investment, we might think about how far an address is from our work.  When thinking about status fulfillment we might think about what a neighborhood says about our particular demographic or maybe...

• What style of grocer is nearby.  
• What a particular street says about our career success.  
• How safe our neighbors make us feel.   
• The attractiveness of the home might speak to our personality somehow.   
• Some might even look to the immediate neighboring properties referring to overall image.  

We apply for a mortgage.  We choose our financial plan to fit the price point of the home that we already found while window shopping, and if we find out we don't qualify, it becomes really hard to downgrade.  If we qualify for more, we might even reassess a concession or two, that we assumed we would have to make, rather than staying within the budget we've chosen, simply because the banking professional said we could afford more.

• We trust that.  
• We don't question it.  
• We congratulate ourselves for being more awesome than previously thought, and we reward ourselves.  
• We accept the lending limitation as a recommendation of what we should buy, because we deserve it, rather that treat it like the ceiling of risk that it is.

Its so easy to spend more.  Its so hard to spend less.  And its a dangerous trap we allow ourselves to fall into.

When tragedy or other financial roadblock strikes our family things get really tight, or even impossible.  The investment is broken and needs to be rescued because the plan didn't work out.  And its the fault of circumstance, not because we weren't safer up front.

• We seek rescue from outside sources for medical bills.   
• Our status isn't broken.  
• We continue to see ourselves as part of the affluent neighborhood.  

At this point, its become a dangerous trap that we have already fallen into, and we blame the unforeseen event, because our sweat and tears went into the home.  And because its our house,  because our community, our identity.  We were qualified.   We deserve.  We can prove our worthiness.

You see, during nearly every stage of housing, when it comes to our residence, we first consider our status fulfillment and only secondly consider our financial investment. 

• And we've been doing it wrong.  
• We've been doing it wrong for decades. 
• We can, we must, and we will change our thinking.  

1.  Financial Investment

2.  Status Fulfillment

3.  See What Order Those Are Prioritized and Check Yourself Often

Be humble.  Live small.  Invest wisely.  Put the ego aside, not only that, kick it to the curb.  Strive for a mortgage free life.   With no rent.  With no bank (ask me how).

Imagine how easy it will be to pay bills when we all own, free and clear.

Even the humblest of houses becomes a worthy treasure to cherish in this light.

This is how we rethink, reimagine, reshape, and rebuild the American Dream.