Thursday, December 28, 2017

The Stories of Us

Each of us has a story.  In fact, each of us might have many stories.  Some stories write themselves by chance, like that wacky time that we dressed up for Halloween to go out into an increasingly wicked October blizzard that dumped 18 inches of snow before the candy could be distributed.  Halloween decorations were ruined, and Christmas wasn't even on our minds yet.  It was so crazy. 

These kinds of stories happen to anyone and they might cause us to over-plan for special occasions. 

We want our planned events to be ((EPIC)) every single time.   So as hosts we try to make magic happen over our few hours, knowing that its possible because of the spontaneous magic we witness in our lives.  Sometimes it works, but usually we try too hard in my experience, like a holiday dinner party.  We should probably work out fewer details, and just allow the meal to transpire.  That crazy drunk uncle is more likely to make a party memorable than the special napkin color we hand select.  I won't say preparation is bad, because plans do show their quality.

I want to talk about the bigger life stories that involve persistence, patience, and of course, planning.  Magic can happen when people use their intentions.   Anthony's story that inspired this article is about a tree trunk project, and a book.  He opens by stating that, "Most people overestimate what they can do in a day and underestimate what they can do in a lifetime."  And I couldn't agree more. 

Fresco of the Sistine Chapel - Michelangelo

Imagine if you will, that you have completed half a dozen small projects already, and then you conceived an idea that you knew could become your magnum opus; an idea that you could really get passionate about, and explore the brilliant, far reaches of your talents.  Then you pitch your project only to find rejection after rejection because your idea is just too progressive.  You sit on it, never really letting it go, and keep plugging away at other various projects.  One day you get a break.  You get to jump into the mainstream and work on a longer, larger project that could earn you enough to perhaps invest in something bigger, so you jump on it.  Its a success.  You've impressed the capitalists.  You invest your earnings.  You put it all into your previously rejected vision.  You start to get some more backing.  And thus, your project is finally underway, and it will likely make or break you forever. 

I'm talking about George Lucas.  He had Star Wars screaming across the galaxy of his mind through various tedious films because nobody wanted to produce it.  He got his break with American Graffiti, and invested every dollar into self-producing his magnum opus.  40+ years later, Transferred to Disney it is still... well you know this story.  Practically everyone does.

No.  We don't all get to be George Lucas.  In fact, most of our opuses aren't historically noteworthy at all.  However, let's not split hairs over the intrinsic significance of our little masterpieces.  Our lives are first dedicated to ourselves, and to our families, and then perhaps even beyond for some.  The truth is, we never know how far our reach will go until we do it.  George knew his idea to be great.  He had no idea how big it would be at the time of inception.  He took his shot regardless of the outcome.

We need to follow our passions.  We need to accomplish a dream or two.  These things make us alive.  We also need to allow ourselves to fail, and to allow our failures to be one of our most important teachers.  And in the spirit of Anthony, here is how we can:


1. Breathe and Be kind to yourself

Even if you’re guilty of starting something and not finishing it, let that baggage go.  Maybe you lost interest.  Maybe you got stuck.  Maybe you just got lazy about it.  Forgive your shortcomings.  Be okay with whatever reason.  Pick it up again.  Or don't!  Maybe it wasn't as important as you thought it was, and something bigger, or just different is on your horizon.  There is no benefit in beating yourself up over it.  So just breathe.


2. Define your successes differently

Only you can determine what is valuable in your life.  Success isn't about riches, and it most certainly is not a popularity contest.  Moreover, the pace of your little magnum opus isn't dictated by anyone, perhaps not even you.

Let purity be a priority.  Whatever your aspiration, if it comes from within you, then it will always be just right and beautifully unique.


3. Use time as an ally, not as an adversary

Different projects demand more than others do.  And there will be things that pull you away.  When a project is daunting, break the plan into manageable tasks.  Some of those tasks might even be possible to delegate.  You just never know how big a thing you can accomplish until you wrestle the fear of its size and scope down to portions that fit into your field of vision. 

I can't even see South Dakota from where I sit and yet I've hiked over summit and through valley another 6 states away, because I broke the travel into the pieces I needed to get to those mountain tops.  Bus:flight:cab:train:shuttle:and walking.  I won't even get into how many moving parts there were to be able to paddle a canoe to the arctic ocean.  Further still, others have made it to the moon.  All done by breaking the daunting task into smaller, more manageable procedures. 


Don't forget to celebrate and reward yourself for the portions as well as the whole, because without them, the project will never be complete.  Can you imagine StarWars without a Chewbacca?  Me either.  Every part completes the whole.  And yes, I did just see "The Last Jedi"  and ((LOVED)) it. 

And again, I stress purity.  If your project or goal doesn't fit your values, didn't come from within your beating heart, maybe its not the most important thing to be weighing you down.  Dream with purity.

Many years from now, when we're both old and dying, what will you look back on and be glad that you kept doing?

Sunday, December 24, 2017

2017

In a world full of humans frantically searching for a reconnect with their humanity, like a morning dove lost in a sandstorm, I found you.  Or you found me.  However the magic happened, I'm so grateful you're here.




May we continue to share in all the years and holidays to come.

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

5 Examples of Metanoia

I learned a new word that has a definition which matches something many of us associate with the holiday season.  It is also something that happens to every single person I meet that has taken a plunge in one way or another into Living Minimalism. 

Interest in learning more usually stems from some vague, unclear want, or desire to shed the busyness of modern life.

that you have the most beautiful face

Then inexplicably, yet without fail, at some point of their journey there is a moment of clarity in which some hidden truth becomes exposed.  Some aspect of their daily lives that was once interpreted as a 'must have' stands out as ineffective, or even burdensome.  That is precisely when the desire to simplify becomes a need that leaves the person, mouth agape in disbelief, dumbfounded that they hadn't seen it sooner.  And so, they decide to fall in love with themselves all over again, and they begin to change.

After that, they see more and more items with the same realization.

George Bailey realized his loved ones were not better off without him, and that wasn't worth more dead than alive, because he had friends.

Ebenezer Scrooge realized he needed to drastically change his greedy ways.  In older versions of his story, he goes so far into benevolence that he appears insane with joy.

The nameless protagonist boy in the Polar Express who was doubting Santa hears the jingle of the bell, and thus his gift is "believing". 

The Grinch annihilated the entire capital industry of Who Village, only to witness them celebrate regardless.

"First you make all the mistakes one makes testing reality. Then you have a near death experience."  -Johnny Madden

met·a·noi·a  -  [medəˈnoiə]   noun

Change in one's way of life resulting from penitence or spiritual conversion.


Happy Metanoia Season!

May your profound experiences be life altering.   -JT

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Holiday Conversation Challenge

Warning:  This is one of the hardest conversations our generation faces.  Its real and its intimate, and some of us only see family once or twice a year.  So, please, act accordingly.

Accordingly:  If you see a person once a year and its Christmas day, you have to communicate on Christmas day.  If you see them every week, you can bring this up as a holiday conversation near Christmas day.  Or maybe you celebrate a different holiday.  Use the apropos visit frequency with any holiday.


We're going to ask our elder who is going to get rid of all their shit when they're dead.   (not like that though, keep reading)  Because, like most of the people I know this is looming large, unspoken, like an elephant in the room, or a collection of cherubs in a room, or dusty boxes of TimeLife magazines in a room.  You know who I'm talking about.

Why is it looming?

The Great Depression vs. The Great Recession

An item often neglected in comparison essays of our most defining crises is financial infrastructure and how it translates to people.  Most essays like this one by Geoffry Michael, compare the causes of crisis, while breezing over the symptoms as mere statistics.  The people who talk about this stuff are economists experts first and human beings second.  What really matters to us is our own household economy.
  • People had less space and less stuff in 1929.  
  • Credit cards didn't exist yet, so people were paying cash for their belongings.  
  • Grocers had their own credit lines for people living on the margins.  
  • Household items weren't made out of plastic yet.  
  • Not living in a manufactured obsolescence market.  Their goods weren't disposable.

When the economy crashed, let's pretend its '29.  Its not that you can't go get a loan because your FICA score is dented up a bit.  Instead your food supply is cut off.  So is your heat.  Your kids get sick, perhaps die.  You might pack up your valuables and flee from your creditors to the rough country of the midwest.  New emergency assistance was put in place to save American lives.j

The kids that grew up with that trauma, gave birth to the boomers, and they passed that second hand traumatic mentality of clinging to everything down to them.

Everything was valued and cherished, even irreplaceable.

The nostalgia of that family connection became a marketable fashion trend for households.  Antiquing became a significant part of our retail environment.  Hoarders became a thing due to the effects of escalation.  Contrast that with today's automation, the advent of plastics, engineered obsolescence, and the rise of the information age, coupled with the adverse effects of generational loss of do it yourself capability.  No need to repair>inexpensive plastic>easily replaceable abundance>junk>landfill.

So when the market crashed again in '07, this time our belongings lack value of attachment.  This time people are streamlining, becoming mobile, or becoming minimalists.  People are now looking to pinterest to learn how to do things grandma knew how to do when she was 7 years old.  Its not the physical tools we're valuing; its the survival skills we covet.  We're trying to buy less and rely on our hands more.  We're longing for things like:
  • Changing oil.  
  • Glazing windows.  
  • Making soup.  
  • Foraging for syrup.
  • Crafting laundry detergent.

And this generation doesn't want all the stuff that's accumulated over the years, because most of that is crap too!  A hundred year old butter churn?  Sure.  Maybe if you're handy you can repurpose it into a shelving unit for your Kleen Canteens.  But most of it is just unwanted junk.  For many boomers, this is hard truth to reconcile.

So, how do you breach this with an unaware loved one?

Hint dropping:  "I heard that the antique mall in Stillwater has decreased its space by half!"  "Really?"  "Yeah, apparently the market for passing down items has really declined and things aren't selling well."

Or,  "It was so sad when Margaret passed, and it to top it off, it was so hard on Jon and Judy because they couldn't comfortably take the time to really go through all of her things"

**Hints only work if they aren't having memory problems, which is another issue entirely**

Start specific:  "You know Carl and I have been wondering about your sewing machine, do you still use it?, yeah because we'd really like to keep that in the family."  Converse about projects or whatever  "... no nothing else comes to mind"  and probably "No not that either.  Nope.  Not that either"

Be direct:  "Hey, I don't know if you're thinking about downsizing your unused belongings, I'm here if you want to talk about that process.  It sure would help me out a lot if we started that."

***Please comment below with other ideas to open this can of worms.***

Those are just a few ways to politely let them know you are thinking about them and their transition.  Its also really important to stay confident and know what your stance is the topic.  At the same time its also important to listen and know where your place is too.  We're still talking about their life, and their stuff.  Don't get ahead of yourself and treat them like they're dead already.  Yet stay firm so they know that you don't want a mountain of unwanted responsibility when they go.

Its a project you can work on together that is intimate, and if done with teamwork will bring you closer together before they go.

Nobody wants their legacy to be that they left their children with a burden.  So be honest.  Be loving.  Be strong.  Be helpful.  Be present.  Be part of a family.

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

3 Crucial Tasks After Crotch Coffee

The ongoing struggle of daily tasks and feeling overwhelmed is something we all face every single day.

One steaming hot mug of coffee spilled onto a tender lap can be enough to derail our readiness and willingness to (insert your daily task here).  Suddenly, nothing is going to go according to plan because;
  • We're not properly caffeinated.  
  • We worry about our appearance for that morning meeting due to the wet, and potentially brown stain near our most private area.  
  • The day is practically ruined.  


deviant art credit alahey "Woman From Coffee Spill"


Rough starts of all kinds happen to the best of us.  Those that are most successful, seem to magically find ways to overcome life's little obstacles, meanwhile, pissing the rest of us off, because some of us have a ruined morning at least twice a week.  One of the ways people overcome these inner dramas involves diligent schedule management.  They forget the coffee issue and focus on their 8AM task.  By the time 9AM rolls around task one is complete, a new cup has manifested itself in some form, the spot on the pants is dry, and the day is going great.

Here are three examples of staying focused by successful leaders:

1.  Organized prioritization simplified by math.  Joseph M. Juran, was an engineer and management consultant who introduced the 80/20 rule.  It was named after the Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto, who observed that 80% of income in Italy was received by 20% of the Italian population.  This 4:1 proportion has been proven to be surprisingly accurate in nearly every business model ever created.  Juran applies this to tasks, showing us that 80% of our results come from the most important 20% of our actions, so conversely 80% of our tasks don't move us very far and should therefore not be prioritized, perhaps even delegated out, and in some cases ignored completely.  Do your 20% that brings results.

2.  Melissa Wilkins lives by a 3 Item To Do list.  She teaches us to take time to identify and articulate the three most important items to accomplish and to focus only on those until completed.  The rest is filler.  She calls it, 'enough'.

3.  Simpler still, minimalist real estate entrepreneur, Gary Keller teaches us that it starts with ONE thing.  He professes that the simple truth behind extraordinary results is to ask this:  What is the one thing I can do such that by doing it everything else becomes easier or unnecessary?  And this question can be applied to any part of our lives.  Like cleaning up a mess.  Purging, means those items have become easier or unnecessary.

The common theme resounding in these examples is that reducing your list will help stay focused on getting the most important things done.  They are easy to read, simple to implement, and from experience, I can attest to their effectiveness.  Furthermore, they are great when we're focused but that goddamned coffee though.  Burnt leg, wet pants, no g*d@mn3d coffee....  *#^*&#$(#!

Ultimately, it was the dread and the panic.  Its our fears, that got the best of us in that moment the coffee splashed our crotch.  We lost focus on our tasks when we were overcome by dread, overcome by bitterness, and overcome by blaming of inanimate objects.  It was all a huge distraction away from the things that matter, only to give all our power to the goddamned coffee.

You might be familiar with the Minimalists who are known to say, "You've won when your dreams have broken through your fears."   If we think about our dreams for one moment of calm, they haven't broken our fears.  We have to be cognizant of our dreams always, even in those worst moments.  We have to not just have our 80/20 plan, but trust in it completely.  Let trust annihilate your panic in that weak moment.  The day isn't ruined.  The coffee is.  The pants are fine.  The burn is hot, but its not hospital time.  The day will progress.  That's when our dreams break our fears.  Your dreams aren't winning now as you're peacefully reading this, if they are only to be forgotten later, when it matters.

Imagine if a person were remember to dream, to trust, rather than panic, every single time there was a coffee spill, or other tragedy.  Imagine if we were the ones who responded positively to everything.

Awareness that our dream is going to include adjusting to problems and speed bumps makes the coffee spill part of the plan, part of the dream, and that is how dream becomes reality, reality becomes dream, and dreams break through the fears.  And a spilled coffee is just a laugh and a refill.

Saturday, December 9, 2017

Ditto

As a person who wants to live simply, below their means, what do you do when you want to decorate and be festive? 



Moreover, what do you do when your neighbor decorates like Clark W Griswold?



Fight fire with fire?



Move to another town altogether?



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Humor for the win.
"Ditto"

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Building A Tradition

Woman's Day, Christmas 1982, and the year we lost my dad to cancer.  I hope anyone from my wrestling team is able to appreciate this family's story.

It's just a small, white envelope stuck among the branches of our Christmas tree. No name, no identification, no inscription. It has peeked through the branches of our tree for the past ten years or so.
It all began because my husband Mike hated Christmas--oh, not the true meaning of Christmas, but the commercial aspects of it--overspending... the frantic running around at the last minute to get a tie for Uncle Harry and the dusting powder for Grandma---the gifts given in desperation because you couldn't think of anything else.
Knowing he felt this way, I decided one year to bypass the usual shirts, sweaters, ties and so forth. I reached for something special just for Mike. The inspiration came in an unusual way.
Our son Kevin, who was 12 that year, was wrestling at the junior level at the school he attended; and shortly before Christmas, there was a non-league match against a team sponsored by an inner-city church. These youngsters, dressed in sneakers so ragged that shoestrings seemed to be the only thing holding them together, presented a sharp contrast to our boys in their spiffy blue and gold uniforms and sparkling new wrestling shoes. As the match began, I was alarmed to see that the other team was wrestling without headgear, a kind of light helmet designed to protect a wrestler's ears.
It was a luxury the ragtag team obviously could not afford. Well, we ended up walloping them. We took every weight class. And as each of their boys got up from the mat, he swaggered around in his tatters with false bravado, a kind of street pride that couldn't acknowledge defeat.
Mike, seated beside me, shook his head sadly, "I wish just one of them could have won," he said. "They have a lot of potential, but losing like this could take the heart right out of them." Mike loved kids - all kids - and he knew them, having coached little league football, baseball and lacrosse. That's when the idea for his present came. That afternoon, I went to a local sporting goods store and bought an assortment of wrestling headgear and shoes and sent them anonymously to the inner-city church. On Christmas Eve, I placed the envelope on the tree, the note inside telling Mike what I had done and that this was his gift from me. His smile was the brightest thing about Christmas that year and in succeeding years. For each Christmas, I followed the tradition--one year sending a group of mentally handicapped youngsters to a hockey game, another year a check to a pair of elderly brothers whose home had burned to the ground the week before Christmas, and on and on.
The envelope became the highlight of our Christmas. It was always the last thing opened on Christmas morning and our children, ignoring their new toys, would stand with wide-eyed anticipation as their dad lifted the envelope from the tree to reveal its contents.
As the children grew, the toys gave way to more practical presents, but the envelope never lost its allure. The story doesn't end there.
You see, we lost Mike last year due to dreaded cancer. When Christmas rolled around, I was still so wrapped in grief that I barely got the tree up. But Christmas Eve found me placing an envelope on the tree, and in the morning, it was joined by three more.
Each of our children, unbeknownst to the others, had placed an envelope on the tree for their dad. The tradition has grown and someday will expand even further with our grandchildren standing to take down the envelope.
Mike's spirit, like the Christmas spirit will always be with us.

Monday, November 27, 2017

9 Symptoms

I've been reading very slowly for stronger absorbtion a book called Radical Simplicity by Jim Merkel.  Derived from his own research, he discusses successful 3rd world examples not flea bitten savages but rather simple people living on a local micro economy and sustainability.


They are content with less than 2% of the possessions than the average American.  Granted they are acclimated.  They aren't in a 'had and pitched it' situation.  They are in a 'never had it, never needed it, don't want it' situation.  The difference in these two situations is our struggle.  Its hard to let go.

He generously skips contrasting their lifestyle to Americans, and instead just shows data to declare how most of us live, citing mass data research done by the United Nations, and other sources of census on planetary stability.  Mathematicians became involved and helped create formulas for calculating usage such as Ecological Impact of various goods, and Carbon Footprinting.  I encourage you to learn more about these studies by <clicking here> and to calculate your own usage by <clicking here>

Findings have shown that the United States, my home nation, is exponentially higher than most in consumption of natural resources, and that if everyone on the planet shared our lavish lifestyle, we'd all be extinct by now.  Earth's abundance is finite if not replenished at or above the rate of consumption.  Some humans like Americans consume more than we are able to replenish.  The only answer to this is to find ways to reduce.  It is physically impossible to grow more/extract more because we'd exceed the available land space.

Why minimalism?  There are many reasons.  Personal freedom, expansion of choices, financial savings, and some even do it for style.  I struggle to find one so noble, meaningful, or obvious as this:  it is up to us to preserve our own life on our only planet.  And minimalism is a great way to reduce our personal carbon footprint.

Below are a 9 fun statistics taken by other recent, and more specific, census studies.

1. The average size of the American home has nearly tripled in size over the past 50 years. -National Public Radio

2. 25% of people with two-car garages don’t have room to park cars inside them and 32% only have room for one vehicle.  -U.S. Department of Energy

3. British research found that the average 10-year-old owns 238 toys but plays with just 12 daily.  -The Telegraph

4. The average American owns 30 outfits, which is triple what it was in 1930.  -Forbes

5. Nearly half of American households don’t grow a savings account.  -Business Insider

6. Some reports indicate we consume twice as many material goods today as we did 50 years ago.  -The Story of Stuff

7. Americans spend more on shoes, jewelry, and watches ($100 billion) than on higher education  -Psychology Today

8. Over the course of our lifetime, we will spend a total of 3,680 hours or 153 days searching for misplaced items.The research found we lose up to nine items every day.  Phones, keys, sunglasses, and paperwork top the list.  -The Daily Mail

9. Americans spend $1.2 trillion annually on nonessential goods.  -The Wall Street Journal

The overwhelming sentiment is that everything is more expensive while wages have flat-lined, and that the biggest baddest CEO's are all lining their pockets.  And, of course, there is some undeniable truth to that.

However interest rates are still nearly as low as they have ever been.  So while communications costs are up, education costs are up, and incomes feel like they suck, part of our financial challenge can be faced in the here and now of our daily choices.  Because, frankly, our own restraint has been neglected for decades.  For some of us things are already so tight that it feels like nothing can be cut.  I encourage everyone to try, regardless of your situation.  The fascinating people Jim Merkel wrote about are quite happy with even less, I promise.


By living more simply, we live more sustainable with ourselves, as well as our planet, and this earth is still our only home.

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Because it's there!

When a New York Times reporter asked George Mallory why he wanted to climb Mount Everest, he infamously responded very simply, "Because it's there."

This enigmatic quote has been repeated by many for nearly a hundred years, and people are still enamored by it.  What is most compelling about this is nobody knows what was truly in George Mallory's heart but George Mallory.  What else is compelling about this is that climbing the big Himalayan peaks is infamously a death sentence.  And though some have reached the top, and lived, that danger is still inherent today.

In the early days of mountaineering Everest, when Mallory was being questioned, death was a mathematical certainty.  Sherpas call her Chomolungma, meaning 'goddess mother of the earth'.

Most importantly, the reporter wasn't asking him, "How will you climb Everest?"  He was asking "Why?", which to me meant, "What powerful force is driving you to want to spend a year preparing, weeks acclimating to prevent altitude sickness, just to risk life and death, only to get to the top of this geographic monstrosity?"


There's no riches.  There's no answers.  There's just the top and nothing more.   And the task is so formidable, that perhaps nobody would ever ask  Mallory another question as long as he lives.  So Why?

At least 290 people have died climbing Everest.  The last year that there were no known deaths was 1977.  In 1996 the death toll was 12 that died in just a matter of hours.

George Mallory was one who did not return.  He died on June 8, 1924, doing exactly what he wanted to do.  Most of us will die, alone, regretting things we never did.  So, climbers don't cry for the deceased.  Instead, they recite his infamous quote, and they do what they love to do. 

There is a big list of available mountaineering tools.  Primarily there is the map, and compass.  Then there is some clothing.  Add to that all the different footwear and accessories, the trekking poles, and ice axes, packs, straps, ropes, caribiners, maybe oxygen.

This is the kind of technical consideration a person would need to calculate when answering the how of mountaineering.  An ambitious climber might choose a different route.  Each mountain will have unique weather.  However their plans are drawn out, they carry as little as they need.

Such is the life of a minimalist.  Minimalists live deliberately.  We choose what we need to be who we want to be, and to do what we want to do.  And, we intentionally don't carry things we don't need on our journey.

People often ask how to live minimally.  How is incidental.  How can be determined by climate.  How can vary between different people coming from different scenarios, and striving for different goals.  How will come after.

First ask why.  Then ask what and where and when?  After those are figured and calculated, do you know who will best answer the how question?  You will.  Because it's there.

**Protip:  Where and when should begin here and now.

You are not alone.  Guidance and tools are available from minimalists, entrepreneurs, coaches, all over the world.  I have a few tools.  So do so many others.  To go back to the mountaineering metaphor, you wouldn't make Chomolunga your first mountain; you'd start smaller, requiring no more than some decent shoes and an adventurous spirit.  Trial and error will be your best teacher.  You'll know which tools best suit you when you start to see your design.

Monday, November 20, 2017

Win Some Lose Some: A Short Story

In Minnesota, loyalists shop at Target, because Target is Minnesotan, and also, because WalMart sucks.  The last time I walked into a WalMart, I was concerned I was going to get some of it on me, and that it might spread  like an infection.  It also made me think that it might make smell bad.  Rotten eggs have a distinct smell, and color.  Its not white anymore, or even yellow, but it might not be gray either.  Its sort of all of those together.  That's the color of WalMart.  The florescent lights shine down on the linoleum floor stained with that same yellowish-gray rotten egg look that only comes from the trampling of fabulous WalMart traffic.  Target has the same color, they just distract me with the bright red and the occasional carpet, which I appreciate.


I had just gotten paid, and in my case that's significant.  My paychecks are commission based, so in essence my bank account appears either totally broke, or rich for a day, depending on what day it is.  So, I went to Target to improve my life, and make my efforts at home feel more meaningful.  When a person goes to Target, they have an agenda, and a dream.  Sometimes they leave with both; in really big white bags.  There are geniuses in their corporate offices laughing about this, I'm sure.   I walk past aisle after aisle of cleaning supplies, looking for just the right aisle.  I'm seeking the one with the drain declogging agents.  Its after the toilet paper aisle, and after the paper towel aisle, and mind you, those are two consecutive, and completely separate aisles.  For a moment I notice these flashes of bright blue, red, and glowing flesh, bouncing off my retina from gigantic, and perfect flat screen televisions, over three hundred feet away.  It's the electronics section.  Three forceful and distinct times I consciously tried to focus on the red sale prices of the end caps on my right, before I realize the images are from a favorite film.  I fight it because I'm on an important mission, and can't afford this distraction.

Ah, my aisle,  scanning, scanning.  2/3 the way down, second shelve from the bottom, I find them.  They have 8 different brands of drain declogging fluids.  My sink is not a frequent problem, so I'm not professionally versed in which chemicals are most effective at breaking down my hair-soap-food-and-whatever sludge that's apparently solidified into a cork, so I read.  It's boring.   And gross.  And boring.  Tom Hanks' voice appears in my head for some reason, mostly likely because he'd probably be able to make this situation a lot more palatable if he were scripting it with me in real life.  I play the eenie-meenie game and choose the one in my left hand, and head straight for the electronics.  Dreading the slippery, stink, I'm probably going to be fishing out when I get home, I consider a well deserved treat.  And I just know Tom's wit is waiting for me just a few more aisles away, near the soft glowing perfection, still dancing on my retina.

I casually stroll the new releases, occasionally glancing at the 12 monstrous, and synchronized screens, and chuckle quietly to myself.  I hold a copy of the new Wonder Woman release, and try to justify the 29 dollars it requires to own it forever.  Reason comes over me, and guides me to the older releases, and then to the 5 dollar overstock.  I know that with patience a little time will devalue that epic heroine of mine.  I had set the declogging agent down somewhere a few feet away, and went back to pick it up.  I see Mr. Hanks.  Tom is looking at me from the bottom shelf, grinning permanently from the cover of "the Burbs".  I smile back because its Tom, and also because I probably already have that one at home, so we're kind of like friends, or maybe even family at this point.  I don't know.  I see a child with her mother walk past with a copy of Wonder Woman, and guilt starts to come over me.  I passed up on the most significant film by women in history, and my lifelong heroine, for a discount.  I discount because I shouldn't be buying any more movies to begin with.  Tom Hanks isn't even my friend and I'm still thinking about his wit in this situation.  I can imagine him peeking around the corner and nibbling on a baby corn as 12 year old from Big, or jumping out and dancing in that ridiculous pumpkin-pimp outfit, freeze, and bark at me, "Any Questions??"  I take my sludge chemicals and my leave, in a near huff.  Screw you, David S. Pumpkins.  You won't draw me in today.

What did she say she needed again?  Oh yes.  The household section.  That's past the clothing, and the baby furniture, just before the stemware and crock-pots.   Basically, I need to do a full loop through the whole store.  This is another Target miracle, or trick.  If you need two items, rest assured, the stock people predicted your needs to perfection just yesterday, and they worked all through the night to arrange the store in such a way that your two items are on opposite ends.  They are that ruthless.  I pause a moment.  Tools.  Let's just have a look.  There's always something missing at the house.  What did we need last time we tried to fix something?  Hmmmmm.  My stroll is slow, confident, and casual.  I'm just taking stock of their inventory is all.  I wrap around the rear endcap, and continue up the second aisle.  Another man is there, crouched, touching a hammer.  He takes a partial practice swing.  Silently, I judge him, "you don't buy your hammer here."  My scoff is nearly audible.  Its certainly visible, so I hope he wasn't giving me sideeye as I pass him.  Nevertheless, my confidence abides.  This place is for 3:1 oil, or air freshener, not real tools.  My pace quickens and I leave the Target tool section.

Did you know that Target makes their own wine???

Anyway, I am off to get that thing.  What did she want again?  Oh yes.  Lightbulbs.  For a moment, I consider new drawer hardware, handles, and pulls, and things, because I remember she said she doesn't like the ones that came with the house, and it would be a nice surprise.  But I decide to wait.  There are at least four other things in this section that create the same thought process of maybes, whatifs, betternots, and I almost forget the lightbulbs.  Almost, until of I see them of course.  I nearly run to them to avoid further distraction.  The wattages, the efficiency levels; they're even more confusing than the 20 or so various chemicals listed on my sludge declogger.  But I know they need to match so I inhale deeply, slowly and try to focus my energy on our light situation.   I got it!  I'm up.  I'm successful, and I can get out of here without wasting the whole paycheck.  I have beaten back Target's barrage of manipulative arsenal, and located my targets, extracted them from the enemy lines, and I'm going to get out alive.

Heading back toward checkout, completing my loop, a sign hovering over a tucked away nook of the store caught my attention.  It just reads "Meaningful".  I try not to get curious, but I've never seen this section, and there are so many happy human faces leaving that area.  There are photos on the wall of very clean, successful, and joyful people.  They're in the sunshine, with plants and flowers, and gazing at one another.  And why don't I even know what this meaningful section is?  Or when they installed it.  Or just how long I've been missing out on the real gem of this home grown store.  I clutch my two items tightly with each hand, so that there's no room to grasp for more.  No risk of misplacement.  I hold them with the intent of not touching anything.  I will not touch.  I'm just going to look.  One of the oversized photos of the beautiful people, twirling in nature is staring at me, with a quote.  Welcome to your meaningful life!  I couldn't help it.  I thought, partially outloud, "you really can buy everything here".  I pondered sincerely and smiling until I rounded the corner.
It was just the photo printing section with a new dazzling face.

Disgruntled, and still thinking about Gal Gadot, and her frustration at a persistent war, and her furious love, I went back to electronics.  I bought Wonder Woman.  I checked out.  I won.  I lost.  And then I returned home, watched Wonder Woman, and I cried during No Man's Land for the 6th time.  One of these days, I'll be as strong as her, and beat back the Target army of consumerism.  But not today.  Today is for Wonder Woman and she's worth every goddamn penny.

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

How: Volume 3 - Self Gratification

Intro: Bipolar Thanksgiving

The pilgrims struggled with harsher winter than they were used to, and they were ill prepared to survive it.  They starved, and went ill.  The natives, upon recognizing their destitution, provided for them so they'd live out the winter.  They taught the newcomers about the heartier plants, but did not impose their lifestyle upon them.  The lifestyle I'm talking about is the acute awareness of their needs, without ambition for accumulation or possession.  They were simple like that.  The natives took from the earth only what they needed, and nothing more.  Their preparedness for travel, or for the hunt was always accessible, and at the ready.  They possessed so little that entire villages would be mobile, migrating along the land, just as birds flee the winter, or bison cross the plain.  The pilgrims stayed and multiplied in number.  Then the greed of societal ambition forced the newcomers to betray their native caretakers.  These pilgrims came seeking new lands and riches.  They came with guns.  They came with slaves.  They conquered and expanded.  They proved that the hands that feed them, can still face exile and genocide.  They built monuments of industry to the sky, and filled the air with smoke, and fume.

This is one of the great dichotomies of modern society: industry, and our longing to reconnect with nature.  It can be summed up by America's dark history revolving around Thanksgiving.  Its that hard, and fast American free market capitalism, versus an older, humbler, and simpler, minimalist method of thriving.  Minimalism was something the natives practiced for their entire existence before the white man.  Although, I don't believe they gave it a name, it was just their way, and there was no other.  That dark dichotomy of Thanksgiving remains in our present tense adhered like hanger on to our annual celebration.  1st we honor each other with family, reflection, appreciation, tightly huddled together in one household, accompanied by a delicious meal; and then the very next day, the great consumer chains open in the wee hours for Black Friday, so we can wet our lust of shiny things, in preparation for next month's gift giving.  Its a conflicted twist of fate, that the dependents became the conquerors, and that the legacy of the conquered lingers today as our reason for gratitude: Quiet.  Simple.  Potent.  Eternal.

Remaining grateful for the littlest things that we take for granted is the essence of Living Minimalism.  Its the way of the natives.  We must remember to honor that, not just on a Thursday of late November, but every day of our lives.  Saying a rare 'thank you' is a nice gesture.  Living from a place of gratitude is a daily life choice.  Gratitude transforms that which we possess today into enough for a complete life.


Below are some guidelines to remaining grateful


1. Recognize Earth's finite bounty

Take time to welcome the trees to their dormant period.  Thank them for oxygen.  Realize that we'd suffocate without them.  Visit a lake shore.  Thank the waters for nourishment because we'd wither without them.  Take a walk.  Thank the soil for nutrition.  For it feeds the plants, and the plants feed the animals and the dead return to the soil.  Breathe in the last odors in the crisp fall air.  Spend more time being fully present outside in all the seasons.   Every moment of a life feels more precious, when it is connecting with earth's bountiful providence.


2.  Play and laugh

I'm not sure how many of us would love to be able to give our employer the middle finger, not out of hatred, but out of disdain for the servitude that sucks the bulk of our lives away.  Work that is disjointed from the natural world is mechanical, and joyless.  The older we get the more it becomes an anchor chained to our well being.  Consciously, we must throw down those chains, and behave as children do, if not for our blood pressure, and our sanity, for our loved ones to admire.  Be outside, laugh, and do it often.


3. Watch your waste

We have commitments, belongings, and relationships to manage.  Living Minimalism means we consciously how significant these are to our core values, and we do not neglect them.  Some things that look like important engagements do not fit in with our life's goals.  If we start sacrificing our most important things for unimportant waste, we are not being grateful, we are being neglectful.  We can monitor this if we engineer our time.


4. Selfishly guard a little time alone

People who don't take breaks are not as efficient as those who do.  Fatigue is one of the leading causes of errors.  Errors that then need to be amended.  Rest yourself frequently.  Take vacations.  Another important aspect of rest that is often neglected is self reflection.  A few minutes at the end of a day to wonder about your actions, reminding yourself of your goals, appreciating the beauty of your dynamic life, not only maintains gratitude, but it also keeps your compass true.  Many people journal.  I'm still seeking my consistent method of reflection.


5. Realize you don't control the fates

Time is fickle.  We specifically make plans intended to be the best times of our lives.  We schedule exotic vacations.  We organize weddings like we own every aspect of the entire day.  Then weather decides it has its own plan, or some other tragedy strikes.  On the other hand, unintended sparks might fly on a Tuesday.   Try not to get discouraged by disappointments, and be ready to embrace surprises.  We don't get to choose all the best moments of our lives, so be courageous enough to live in them when they happen.


6. Richly write your story

While the fates may surprise us with all of the moments of our lives, we do get to choose our actions and reactions.  Even more than anything above, it’s often the script in our heads that move us into our future.  When we choose to react positively, our fate becomes more positive.  ...and vice versa.  And when we choose to follow our bliss, shoot for our goals, and relentlessly, passionately stay on course, we often receive the types of rewards we wish for.  When we choose to let the mainstream carry us, well then fate has a far mightier hand than we might like, so choose to be a collaborating writer in your story.  Take some ownership of your time.  And then remember to be grateful to the fates for their surprises, and remember to grateful to the fates for allowing us to have some authorship over which direction our lives are headed.

2 Cups

CS and I went to the Minneapolis Institute of Art on Sunday for a dreary day activity out and about.  Usually we'd prefer a long hike at a wild park, but its November, cold, wet, windy, and otherwise inimical weather.  No matter how many times I visit the museum, and how many times I wander down the same halls, the non rotating works of art always seem to grab me in different ways. 

This time it was a 6000 year old cup set.  This was not a ornamental, or gaudy cup of kings.  It was pretty, but it was plain.  This cup was built for functionality and nothing more.  It got me thinking about all the cups I've owned just in my lifetime, and how many times I've thrown perfectly good cups away because I found new cups.

you considered how much of the things in your life have gone through the revolving door of consumerism?   I don't know the complete history of that cup in the museum, and if I were to guess, I'd say it was owned for an entire life, and was perhaps passed down through generations within one family.  Imagine your unborn great-great-great-great grandchild using a cup for their entire life, and that cup was the first and only cup you ever used.  Imagine if that cup never went out of style simply because it fulfilled its purpose. 


I have jar glasses, coffee mugs, and stemware at home right now (2 of each, one for CS and one for me), and that 6000 year old cup made me feel like a greedy bastard as it held my gaze. 

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

How: Volume 2 - Time Engineering

People might budget their income in differing ways, and almost all of us do it.  However, not many people take control of time, which has always baffled me.  Money is not more important than time.  A person can always do a little extra to earn more money, but the day doesn't ever get any longer.  "If time be of all things the most precious, wasting time must be the greatest prodigality." -Benjamin Franklin.

Below is my 6 step process to be a Time Engineer



1. Mobilize

For so many people, getting fired up in the morning to attack a fresh day is as simple as a cup of coffee.  I believe there is something within us that is deeper, and more sustaining, that keeps us wanting to move forward.  I also believe that it is different for everyone, like being ticklish.  A button gets pushed just right and the reaction is this stored kinetic energy response, and each person has unique buttons.  A jogger might have specific music that pushes them on the last mile.  A painter might get inspired by some random event, and create a masterpiece.  Its important to know what fires you up, and to use it.


2. Clarity of Plan

{Know Thyself} The reason its so important to frequently practice self reflection, is because the life we're living is our own.  We are the masters of our destiny, and yet, we love to look to others.  We love our heroes, and our celebrities, even our neighbors, (at least some of them).  If we don't keep a close watch on who we are, we might mimic too much.  We jump in the flow of the mainstream, and we leisurely swim with all the others.  Before we know it, we're lost, but comfortable, living everyone else' lives but our own.  Three questions I ask, when analyzing myself to plan my week:

What is the integrity of my character?

What balanced relationships nourish my well being?

What accomplishments must I make to complete my story?


3. Accept the truth

Look.  We all know the story of Aladdin's lamp, so let me just be straight.  You can't have everything, every time you want it; that always leads to humility at best, and disaster at worst.  So, accept the fact that the reason your schedule is cramped is because you are probably trying to do everything.  In entrepreneurial business, a guideline often referred to is the 80/20 rule.  What it means is that 20% of activity generates 80% of results, and vice-versa.  So accept that some of the most important things you need to do, will greatly impact your life, and don't take that much time, and some activities are just crap.  Accept that you need to figure out how to prioritize better.  We all do.


4. Learn to Say, "NO"

Those things that aren't so important, we need to be able to turn away from.  Sometimes its saying 'no' to ourselves by way of self discipline.  Sometimes it means actually saying 'no' to a friend, or loved one, who wants some of our time when we weren't planning on giving it.  Either of these can be very difficult to do.  Personally, I struggle more with the self discipline, but others might have a harder time dealing with others.  Either way, we need to train ourselves to be better at saying 'no' to distractions, and saying 'yes' to living within our own schedule.


5. Ready to Write It Down?

If we've followed the above 4 guidelines we've determined who we are, and what we want, and how to effectively go about getting it, including cutting out the unwanted waste.  Now we need to make sense of our goals and set them as blocks of time.  We need to organize small steps that will lead us to our larger goals.  What do we want to get done this year? month? week? Day?  I do this every late fall.  The plan for the upcoming year starts January 1 and should sustain me until next year.  I plan big too.  I don't always accomplish everything, but I do it anyway.  If I'm going through this process, why would I plan small and boring?  Even if I succeed, I win a mediocre consolation prize?  No.  Plan big.  I plan to make my dreams come true.

I write down everything I want for a year, then I separate it into 12 parts for the months.  Some things are mathematically easy.  For example: if I wanted to save $12K, obviously, I need to sock away 1K per month, 250 per week, 50 per day.  Some things only need to happen once, like clear out the garage.  maybe I'll plug that one into 1/12 and have it be a project for the month of May.  You get the idea.  And I hope you know you should have a big list.  Remember you can fail at some of this, and a lot can get done in a year, so take your time, think it through, and plan an awesome life.

**Don't forget to write down your fun, as a matter of fact, this is first on my list, because no rest and no joy creates burnout.  Plan to take vacation.  Plan to take time for a loved one everyday.  Plan to relax. Plan to get fired up each day. Then plan to work, and after work, don't forget to plan to reflect, so you can plan some more.**

Next, I break the 12 months into 4 weeks each, and so on, breaking those 4 parts into 5 days, keeping in mind the 80/20 rule.  I plan the most effective things first.  Now I have small daily tasks that, when organized into a bigger picture, add up to a really good year.

To answer a nit-picky question, "No, I don't know what I am doing on Wednesday the 14th of July already."  I just know that I have approximately 5 work days, and 2 play days, and projects that need to get done, and goals I want to reach, so that I can build my ultimate life.  I might know that May is intended to be garage cleaning month, but for the most part, the daily chores have some flexibility.  Its planned to accommodate surprises.

A year long goal is too big to focus on in one day, but just one part of a set of building blocks that add up is easy.  And I want my day to be easy.  Its not set in stone, its just a map to stay on course.  So, when I fail to complete the garage clean out in May, I carry the remainder over to June, and then things really get hectic, so I assess the damages, and make a few sacrifices if needed, and I carry on.  The thing is, I remember what is important, and I choose when to work extra, or maybe even dump something until next year if I'm overwhelmed.  What I don't do, is blindly give in to my devices, thus giving control back to the mundane everyman in the mainstream.

Try this for yourself, and you'll be amazed how much you can achieve in a year.  I also think you'll be amazed to find out how much you could have achieved last year, had you already been creating a plan, and how much time you wasted doing the 80% that didn't matter all that much.

So you have a plan written down, and if you're like me, you may have revised it and edited some things.  Now you can put it away until it begins, (in my case January), and when that date arrives...


6. Return to step 1 and Execute Your Plan

Step 1 was mobility.  If you'r going to accomplish the big year, you'll need that coffee, or music, or other inspiration each day.  You have to follow through.  Even if it is imperfect, and falls a little short, like mine does every year, at least you'll know where you stand , and where you're going.  When you don't know where you stand, and you don't remind yourself of your goals, and what you want your year to look like, you'll get lost in the mainstream with all the other numb fish, doing what all the other little fishies do.  That isn't how dreams are made.  Execute. Execute. Execute.  Fail, and execute regardless.

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

How: Volume 1

Minimalists are everywhere.  Simply put, its just a method of living.  Minimalism is a tool to make the most of yourself.  And, its imperfect, or only as effective as its user, who is human, and is going to make some mistakes.  You can't be an explorer without getting lost.  You can't be a warrior without getting hurt.  You can't get rid of things without losing something important, just like you can't attain belongings without finding out some of our purchases were completely useless.  Progress always comes with failures, the trick is to learn from them, and keep moving forward, and minimalism does include continual course correction.  Lost people who become found again are those who make discoveries.  Broken warriors who keep fighting win respect and valor.  Minimalists who stay true to their course of digging out of their rubble find joy in their lives that others fail to uncover.

Allow me to offer some guidance




Do Not Compare:  Comparisons do nothing more than detach you from your own happiness.  This isn't the same as inspiration.  Go ahead and get inspired by those you look to, as long as you remember they are on their own separate path.  Stay present.  Stay focused.  Most importantly stay true to your own goals, abilities, and achievements.


Do Identify:  Identifying what is most important to you helps keep your compass pointing true, which is one of your most reliable tools for reaching, tomorrow, all of the destinations that are out of reach today.  For help on figuring out your compass go here:  Know thyself.


Do Not Fear:  Fearing how others see us is one of the primary vulnerabilities that leads us to buy into the traps of consumerism.  Fearing to let go attaches us to ever expanding dead weight that we carry with us along our journey.


Do Declutter Your Spaces:  The opposite of fear is freedom, not courage.  Courage is action in spite of fear.  Alleviation of fear is freedom.  We'll need both.  Courage to face the fears, and freedom to move.  Freedom to walk.  Freedom to choose.  Freedom to grow.  We collect and cling to clutter out of fear.  Laying to rest, the dead weight of unnecessary objects, allows flexibility, and freedom.


Do Not Submit to Emptiness:  Decluttering opens up opportunity.  If we are not thoughtful, and selective, and we refill the room we've just courageously created with new clutter, we've then submitted to our devices, and eliminated our own progress.  We've given our opportunity back to our fears.  Take time to consider your goals before refilling the emptiness.


Do Timeblock:  Think of time management the same way you think of financial management and monitor it even more rigorously.  People tend to waste more time than they do money, and although time sometimes feels more abstract, it has a greater finality to it.  Spend it wisely.


Do Not Perfect:  Perfection will usually derail you from, more than help you stay on your path.  Give yourself permission to experiment, and even to err.  Everything you are doing is part of an interesting journey.  Laugh with it.  Learn from it.  Improve upon it.  There are no right or wrong answers to living.


Do Reflect:  We had a goal.  What was it?  Are we nearer to it?  Is our journey enjoyable?  Is it all worth the effort?

No destination is worth a lifetime of torture.  Yet, no life is worth living that doesn't feed our purpose.  Reflecting is nothing more than what we did in the past when we identified and trued our compass.  Only now we're re-identifying with the new information we've gathered.  Do this again, and again, and again, and always with gratitude for both accomplishments, and learning experiences.

Thursday, October 26, 2017

Curtailing Gift Glut

Halloween is around the corner, and we know what that means: The first of the consumer Christmas music, decor, and other holiday marketing tools are starting.  After a month we'll have Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and the final mad rush of gift stress before the big day.  That's right.  Santa is coming.  Its a two month extravaganza of present porn, and for the minimalists, the most dreaded aspect of goodness.  

I am sharing 7 brilliant tips from Joshua, partially because he's got kids in the house to consider, and because he's spot on as usual.  The little darlings add additional layers to this meaningful time of year.  In his piece, he goes into various types of gift givers, from love, to manipulation.  Personally, I am not ready to get so emotionally involved.  Focusing on the complexities of other peoples' giving motivation would just add to my own holiday stress.  Nevertheless, there are some helpful understandings written in there.  I simply don't want to dampen the spirit, or judge anyone, or even downplay anyone else' benevolence, because I'd rather stay hopeful, trusting in others' good intentions.  Honoring goodness is what this time is all about.  If you feel advanced enough that these tips aren't quite enough, and you'd like to wade into the greed reading pool, and attempt to improve on other givers' habits, go for it.  I fully support courageous efforts of the bold.  
I only added notation on the one tip that comes from an outside source, which I believe falls short of respecting others' emotions, or at least doesn't address potential negative reactions.  Without any further ado, here they are: 

1. Begin with fewer possessions. We have celebrated numerous gift-giving holidays and special occasions since deciding to become minimalist. Each time, I am reminded one benefit of minimalism is that there is “room to add.” Because we have kept our personal belongings and kids’ toys down to a minimum through regular sorting and purging, there is room in our home for new things to enter. Although adding new things may seem counter-productive to the pursuit of minimalism, it is in fact, one good reason to consider it.

2. Make your gift requests known early. Though it does not always work out this way, gift-givers should desire to match their gifts with the receiver’s wishes. Creating gift lists and providing them to family members well in advance of holidays and celebrations can be a very helpful tool in limiting the clutter collection. Work hard to provide a wide-range of gift ideas varying in prices. Again, follow this formula: request quality over quantity, needs over wants, and experiences over products.

3. Make a memorable statement. Issue this Holiday Gift Exemption Certificate.  
**JT's note on Gift Exemptions:   Some loved ones will really frown at this when you present the idea.  A response to a failed exemption attempt that makes a wonderful compromise is to request perishables/consumables.  The reason that expressing no need for stuff can be disappointing for people who strongly desire to splurge is because its how they express love.  How heartbreaking for someone to declare that their love is unwanted.  In that case, concede, and make a request for a favorite gourmet cheese, chocolate, wine, or liqueur.  Conceding can revive the holiday spirit in your kinship, and keep it from going sour.  These items all keep.  They are all special.  They won't interminably linger in your space.  

4. Be patient with your family. If living with less is a new pursuit for you, do not expect everyone else in your family to understand the first time around (especially if you are known for going through various phases in the past). Eventually, years down the road, they will begin to understand this is a lifestyle you are seeking to embrace for the long term and their gift-giving habits will likely evolve.

5. Humbly accept they may indeed have a good idea. Pride is always costly. It prevents us from seeing important life changes and other people’s points of view (among other things). This is important to remember when accepting gifts—especially from thoughtful gift-givers. When accepting gifts, embrace the idea that they may indeed know something that will add value to your life and benefit you in the long run. Be open to receiving their gifts and input. It would be foolish and proud for us to assume we know all the good things that could be added to our lives.

6. Purge guilt-free. It may take some time for you and your family to sort out which holiday gifts add value to your home and which only add clutter. With kids, it can often take months to determine which toys are a passing fad and which will become truly loved. Give it some time. But as the value of the gifts begin to reveal themselves, purge guilt-free. The gifts were given to you or your children (ideally with no strings attached). And, if they will find more use given to someone else, then please don’t hesitate to give them away. Rare is the gift-giver who wants their gift to be a burden on you or your home.

7. Reciprocate your request. You hope, desire, and expect other people to give gifts that align with your desires. Return the sentiment when you give gifts to others. Just because you make a desperate plea for experiences over products does not mean your brother, sister, father, or mother is requesting the same. If they would like new shoes, consider buying them new shoes. If they make it clear they desire a department store gift card for their birthday, at the very least, consider giving them a department store gift card. Giving gifts is an opportunity to show your love and appreciation. You can make your case for anti-consumerism at a different time.
Happy Holidays!

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Temet Nosce

It is my most profound belief, that to be successful at Living Minimalism, or to be successful in any endeavor, you must, to quote Socrates, "Know thyself".  This integral foundation requires reflection, and introspection.  Knowing what you stand for, who you are, and what is important to you, is the bed of embers that keeps your fire burning when all the smaller sparks in your life fail to get you going.  The empty happiness that comes from small rewards will wane in the darkest hours.  But a person, with a dream that they feel in their core, will be sustained through things like, double-shifts, family illness, tragedy, or even temporary unemployment for several months.  It will drive them to make it through all of their hardest fought battles. 

"People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits and their habits decide their futures." -F.M. Alexander 

Living Minimalism isn't easy, because it means change.  It means changing your habits.  It means taking the time to carve out excess.  Excess isn't just garbage; sometimes its the very real, and very enjoyable items of luxury that just don't fit with our core beliefs.  Living Minimalism means taking on some difficult tasks to achieve a dream.  Mostly, it means making hard choices, because choice always precedes change.  You choose to exercise more.  You choose to save your money, rather than spend it.  You choose to clean out your closet.  You choose to eat locally.  Making these choices once in while is good.  Making them consistently is a habit.  Habits are daily.  Habits require monitoring, and conscious attention before they become routine.  Routine of minimal living over time makes room for an exceptional life.  Implementation is tough, but deciding is the first, and hardest step to take.  Not choosing minimalism is choosing the status quo.  The status quo is easy.  The status quo is comfortable.  Choosing change is a challenge.  The hard decision to achieve everything will not have won until your dreams have shattered the ceiling of your comfortable sanctuary that houses you from your imagined fears.

"Make sure everyday you do what matters most.  When you know what matters most, everything makes sense.  When you don't know what matters most, anything makes sense." -Gary Keller

Dreams is what I wanted to talk about.  My professional guru, and the man in the preceding quote, calls this the "big why".  When thinking about goals, we all have some things we'd like to achieve, and most of them are not big enough, like hard work period might equate to dining out at a fancy restaurant, and splurging on a five hundred dollar bottle, perhaps to woo our partner, or just to celebrate a termination of a hard project.  That might work for a little while, but a little while isn't big.  Its a spark, not an ember.  A friend of mine wants to be able to buy real estate for each of his three kids, so that he can retire with the peace of mind that he alone has contributed to each of their futures in a permanent and meaningful way.  A few pictures of the little darlings in and around the office would be enough to remind him why he gets up for work each day.  There's real momentum in having a dream like that.  Its big.  Its deep.  Its his, and only his.  I don't have to understand it, and neither do you.  However, he does, and it moves him on the days he doesn't want to move himself.  I encourage everyone to discover their own "big why".  It can really help a person get into the happiest part of their lives, to really contemplate this, and implement parts of it into their daily tasks, either as a motivator, or as actual action plans.  CS asks, "What did you do today that brought you closer to your goal? ..and what did you do that drove you away?"  The brilliance in this is in the knowing.  Without knowing, any habit, good or bad, could be acceptable in our little daily choices.  Our little daily choices add up in a big way over time.  In the reflection image I'm sharing this week, the dream is clear, but the reality is hazy.  This is true to live.  Our daily struggles fog up our path that sometimes we need to reflect on who we are and what we want to see where we are going.



With so many methods of minimalism, how do I begin to implement? 

To be honest, that's up to you.  Everyone has their reasons for wanting to cut waste in their life.  Me?  I want more mountaintops and lake overlooks.  I want oceans and trees and wildlife.  I want adventure and lots of it.  You've got to  have your own 'big why".  Living Minimalism is not the endgame, its procedural.  Its simply a method of making more room for what matters.  More freedom is something in this age of excess, that we all desire. 

Do you have a big why?  Do you 'know thyself'?   Would you be fulfilled with the status quo, or do you secretly long for something more? 

Because when you start Living Minimalism, less is more.   Something more, is the reason.  What that something is for you is going to become your own life adventure.  

Live it!